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Sometimes our own life stories can not be shared no matter how hard we try. Sometimes humanity finds favor in humor rather than humanity itself. I see so much being shared on social media that involves politics, cats, dogs, photoshopped pictures and the like.

What I see very little of is the sharing of struggle, lives altered or journeys yet to be taken. The real stories of all of our lives.

I see so many likes on such stories when I see them but I see very little effort to speak or to share a story as requested. I do see words from time to time but no more.

Maybe we should all remember that when we share we need to share one another and share the negative of life for we can all learn from it. We can benefit from it.

Maybe we should also remember the story behind the pictures and the words you read. There are husbands, wives, daughters, sons and grandchildren being hurt and saddened. You can not see them but they are there. I am here.

Some have shared what I post as to our story, some have prayed, some have offered to help and some have donated and we are so thankful for that. What hurts me I think is that when I look at the amount of people that I touch with my everyday posts, those positive posts (980+ people) and then open to the public I get plenty of interaction and I make a difference in at least one life each day and I thank God for that. Those posts I see shared so many times but when I share our story, Gwen’s journey I see very little.

If you each only knew that a lot of what I write I write for Gwen in hopes to keep her going and positive and believe me when I say she probably gets sick of hearing it because she has seen very little benefit from it in the actions of others towards us!  I write for me as well. A lot of the time when you read my posts on staying positive and staying the course I am typing with tears in my eyes but I am always sincere in what I say.

No, our story that we or i choose to share does not show you the pain and the fear but know that it is there and know that it is real. Our children hurt I hurt and we are all scared and no one more than my Gwen. I become more so as our 18th wedding anniversary approaches.

I will continue to write what I do and I will continue to share our lives from time to time but as I do I hope that my faith and trust in humanity is not ill placed. I know in my heart it can’t be!?

In the end it is up to each of us to make a difference in this world. To leave our marks for the good. It is up to us how we live our lives. I choose still, even with a heavy heart, to continue to do what I can for others and most of all my family and my wife. This is why I am here and all of my life experiences have lead me to this point and prepared me for what ever is to come and what ever comes it does so for a reason and my family and I will learn from it no matter.

I am done now with my little rant. If I offend I apologize but I hope that you understand. When we see over 200 likes on our donation page and only 12 donations and then not one from any family it kinda kicks you in the chest a bit and then to be told by a reporter that we are not “desperate” enough to share our story and that it’s not emotionally reactive enough for ratings and then i find flyers for her benefit in the trash!! I think you get the point. Maybe they should see me cry as I write or film me as I stand each night at our bedroom door watching my wife sleep and moan in pain as I try to hold back my tears before I go lay with her. Maybe if they were filming me now as I type this and wipe a tear from the screen of my phone. Maybe?

As always I say to you each with all that I am, God bless you and all of those to whom you are connected!